The African culture has always made the female sexual experience a topic that’s not allowed to be discussed freely even amongst the couple. It’s in that category of “Things we shall not speak of”.
Although, in recent times things are beginning to change, men are beginning to listen to their women about bedroom matters. If men take cues from women about sex, the bedroom will be happier and more satisfying place to be. Women have been taught to massage and flatter the male ego through time, to make him seem infallible which doesn’t help the man become a better lover.
There is no room for improvement if a lady cannot tell her man what he is doing wrong in the bed. One fear is that it might make the man feel uncomfortable or inadequate but receiving honest feedback is good for both parties.
The Africa culture has made it very awkward for a woman to tell her man, “I like that, keep doing it” or “No, don’t do that, please stop”. The social construct will label such a woman as a hoe or a prostitute simply because she is offering feedback on the sex.
So, in the spirit of full disclosure, these are things that they won’t tell us. You’ll need to read this to help you get better.
1. Haa! You learnt that from a porn video
Well, they apparently know. I get it guys, we feel the need to feel like a porn star. So, we pick these style and stand out of the videos. It looked cool in those videos but apparently, it might have looked good on film because it was done that way purposely but not so cool in real-life. Porn movies are directed in a way that the sexual organs are prominent, and it’s just those genitals that interact together mostly.
Sex between couple is more intimate than pornography, so it’s about the guy touching and caressing the lady all over not just boobs and the ass. Guys they know, when you see her looking at you strangely, it might be time to throw that stuff from porn out of the window and get to what she likes.
2. Short sex isn’t always bad
Guys are mostly shy about this, every guy wants to last more than 2 minutes. Seriously, it can be an harrowing experience if a guy cannot last more than 5 minutes, it doesn’t matter how rich you’re, shit is gonna bother you.
The truth is long sex doesn’t always equal maximum satisfaction. Pounding her for a hour doesn’t mean she is enjoying it, she probably tuned out 10 minutes into it, and all you’ve been doing is waist exercise. Long sex isn’t for everybody, short sex sometimes does the trick. No need to kill yourself.
3. Women know how to achieve orgasm
Men like to experiment a lot, that is for guys to listen to their woman’s body, not those trying to just bust a nut, roll over and sleep off. She has probably played with herself to an extent that she knows how to cum, and sometimes it might involve a toy. The path to orgasm might be using a vibrator but such things might make the man feel weak, not able to the task, so ladies keep shut.
Some ladies also might cum from a long ass head, which might be terribly boring for a guy. It might help to talk about this at a time when the stakes isn’t high, for instance when you’re all chilling alone not with family or friends.
4. Orgasm can be such a bother
Nah, you didn’t read that wrong. Not all women can orgasm easily but this doesn’t mean that the sex isn’t fun, because of orgasms can be tough for some women, they are scared they will disappoint their partners, and people like these might avoid sex because they don’t want their partner to continue to try all time to give them orgasm.
This might be one of the reasons why women fake orgasm, or moan loudly during sex, it is to make the man enjoy the experience because sex is more enjoyable when the lady is moaning, and guys can also help a little, make sounds that means the sex is banging, don’t just keep thrusting like a soldier without emotions
5. Be gentle
This might be because of the porn videos but sincerely the female body isn’t a specimen to be treated rough unless she has categorically told you so. Take it easy on the nipples, tease the clitoris gently. Don’t go rough on it like you’re washing jeans or piling beans. Take it easy, man.
You can dive mouth first at the genitals but without technique, you might just be doing more harm than you think.